Saturday, April 1, 2023

March 31, 2023 DDF Breathes New Life Post/The past, trauma, strength in today

My thoughts today are just as frazzled as my overcommitted week. I must reign in my perspective of what others expect of me and my own expectations of myself. Being pulled in so many directions I am not fully completing what I want to do by the end of the week. Anxiousness and discouragement are not a good combination. I am sure you can empathize with me. I read this scripture this morning which just seems to have perfect timing. I probably need to read this each morning until I memorize it and then put it into practice. It is great advice.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4: 6-7).

In this scripture is also advice to guard my heart and mind. Ever get dragged into the spiral of manipulation? It is more that the person hasn’t dealt with his/her own demons, so it is easier to pull others down or back to the moments of shame, guilt, or fault. If you have past regrets and mistakes, do you deserve to be permanently placed in the penalty box? No, we learn from those dark moments. We learn to forgive ourselves. We act by forgiving others.
Perspective is defined as “a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.” It is the way individuals see the world. It comes from their personal point of view and is shaped by life experiences, values, current state of mind, assumptions brought into the situation, and whole lot of other things.

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior, and my God” (Psalm 43:5).

Writing this book isn’t about pulling down others but seeing all the amazing miracles God put into place to bring me too today. After I finished my podcast this week, I remembered a very vital moment. There was a gun. From where I don’t remember. I was standing next to my mom. She pulled the trigger that was aimed at his chest. But it didn’t go off. Three clicks and just as my mom pointed the gun down to see why it didn’t go off it did. Right into his foot. If that gun had gone off killing him our lives would have been very different. We would have had a parent in prison probably for life. Would my sisters ever have existed? My perspective in this memory is it is an unbelievable story but very much true. I know in the back of my mind how the events in my life have affected everything I am today.

Trauma is engrained into a child’s soul. It injures how boundaries are developed. It is an intensely painful emotional experience. It can be emotional, physical, and sexual.

***Trauma lies that the world is unsafe with nowhere to find protection.

It’s hard to have trauma in your past that continually causes you pain. My own journey of experiencing trauma has brought about me finding blessings. One thing I do know is that God draws close to the brokenhearted. God has kept track of my sorrow. God continually renews us every day with His Spirit. I am thankful every day brings a new morning to try again at loving God and serving others. Here is some great advice:

“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book” (Psalm 56:8).

“He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flied by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday” (Psalm 91: 4-6).

“But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves” (James 1:22).

This song by Mosaic MSC “Tremble” is a soothing call to the peace with just one name, Jesus, who makes the darkness tremble.
Prayers that no matter your circumstances or past demons that seem to still haunt your mind that you let the words in the song bring you comfort. Prayers for healing in our country and may the division fade. Restore and Renewal!

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